By Charles William (Isa Arsalan)

“So whoever Allāh wants to guide – He expands his breast to [contain] Islām; and whoever He wants to send astray – He makes his breast tight and constricted as though he were climbing into the sky. Thus does Allāh place defilement upon those who do not believe.”
Quran 6:125

Assalamu’alaikum Warahmutallahi Wabarakatuh, May the peace and blessings of our Lord be upon you.

My name is Isa Arsalan, born Charles William. Alhamdulillah, I took my Shahadah on the day of Arafah in 2023, during a Converts Central Eidul Adha Takbir event, in the presence of Ustaz Sameer and many brothers as witnesses. On 8 July 2023, I took my official Shahadah at Darul Arqam. I was born a Roman Catholic, and the journey I undertook in my previous faith led me ultimately to Islam.

My family, particularly my father, were devout Catholics and as such, from a very young age, I was introduced to the church, worship and the Bible. My parents ensured my faith building and enrolled me in religious classes, called The Cathechism of the Roman Catholic church. As such, I had a high interest and involvement in religion. Unsurprisingly, that led to an ambition to want to be a Roman Catholic priest. I spent a lot of time reading Bible stories and reading up on liturgical practices. I used to run mock Catholic masses at home for my family members who will act as “parishioners”. In that aspect, I was very connected to faith and to God.

Even at that young age, I remember being more fascinated with the Old Testament than the New Testament in the Bible. I spent a lot of time reading stories of great biblical characters like Adam (pbuh) & Eve (pbuh), Lot (pbuh), Noah (pbuh), Moses (pbuh), King David (pbuh) and King Solomon (pbuh). I loved scripture and everything to do with God and the church. Through attending religious classes and masses in church, I developed a great love and respect for the teachings of Jesus (pbuh). As a child, with only the church being a major influence on my life, I viewed Jesus (pbuh) as God, as what the church professed. When I was entering teenagehood, my father encouraged me to read as widely as possible when it came to religion and to question certain aspects, so as to increase my knowledge and practice my faith better. What he did not expect was that those questions I asked would lead me away from the Trinitarian teachings of the church towards the monotheistic teachings of Islam eventually.

During my teenage years, my father was incarcerated and I had a rough time, living in poverty most of the time, though my fascination with the bible never stopped. Though I stopped going to church, I would go back to reading the Old Testament from time to time, though not in the sustained manner that I did during childhood. I got into some bad company during my mid-teens and went astray from the Bible. Allah ﷻ works in mysterious ways. The group of friends I mixed with were mostly (non-practicing) Muslims and through them, I got to know that Christianity and Islam shared some of the same prophets and that Islam considered Jesus as a Messiah. When I was 17, I asked my mother if I could convert to Islam, a request she denied. Looking back, it was for the better as I barely knew anything about the faith other than bare basics and while interested, I was trying to do it more for the sake of being included by certain friends.

I had not led a good life prior to that with the aforementioned bad company. One such instance of committing something I regret doing led me to a Muslim individual, who had an impact on me. He led not by means of preaching but through his conduct of his daily life. His actions provided me an example of how to lead a better life despite having precious little.

He was a Muslim and knowing of my mother’s prior rejection of my desire to convert, he told me to at least go back to church and to God. He called me a person of the book, something which I understand now. When I was 19 reaching 20, I re-entered the church. While being steadfast in prayer, I continued to question aspects of the Bible, especially matters concerning the divinity of Jesus. Those questions, and the oft-repeated “Jesus was killed by the Jews” led me to explore Judaism for a short while. While I found out more about the Jewish faith and its practices, there was never a conviction within me to want to adopt the faith. This was more due to how Judaism viewed Jesus (pbuh). I am also a person who is more convinced by acts than words. Seeing the acts of a certain Jewish-majority country also turned me away from the religion.

In 2012, I asked my then-girlfriend (a non-Muslim, who would go on to marry me) if she would be okay for me to convert to Islam if I so wished to. While she said yes, she also told me that her parents would not be keen to allow her to marry a Muslim. In view of that, while I did not stop in the pursuit of knowledge about Islam, I did not actively pursue the thought of conversion, leaving it to God’s will. After a tumultuous marriage, I applied for divorce in 2022 and that kickstarted the restart of my pursuit of destiny. Once again, it was through the acts of a person more than any form of preaching. I had a friend who was going through severe mental health issues, even having suicide attempts along the way. However, despite it all, the person woke up almost every night to pray Tahajjud. It was the first time I had heard of the prayer and was very interested to know what it was all about. My friend continued to keep close to his faith, praying at every opportunity despite all the mental health woes. The commitment to prayer and the deep faith the person had inspired me to restart learning about Islam at a deeper level. I went back to the Bible at the same time, starting a pursuit in June 2022 to complete the Bible by the end of the year. As I was reading the Bible, what I was very attached to was Jesus’s (pbuh) teachings on always turning back to God and how to pray to God.

I prayed and asked for God’s will to be done unto me. I completed the Bible way ahead of time and decided to read the Bible front to back one more time. Not only was I inspired by the Old Testament but reading more into Jesus’ (pbuh) teachings convinced me even further that Islam was the path for me, that he was a great teacher and a prophet who led the way to God but was not God himself. Till today, no Christian who I have had a dialogue with is able to answer as to why Jesus (pbuh) did not refer to himself as God or taught a single prayer that should be addressed to him. No one is able to answer also as to why Jesus (pbuh) prayed to God if he was God himself.

I purchased a book titled “The Islam Book”, which follows a series of books which covers many aspects of the social and physical sciences and different religions. Despite me being convinced, only one thing was stopping me: Fear. I was surrounded by non-Muslims and I was very sure that I will face rejection from family members, especially when it came to Islam. I had been toeing the line for a number of years, calling myself a “Muslim-Christian”, because I was following Jesus’ (pbuh) teachings while not believing, at least to a large extent, that he was God.

Towards the end of 2022, as my divorce was getting finalised, I entered the online dating world, more as an escape from loneliness rather than to find anyone for a serious relationship. Man plans and God plans, and God’s plan always takes precedence. I met my now-fiancée there. Of course, she being a Muslim was a plus point. I had wanted more Muslim friends to help me to take that next step. We did not take long to get together, and I told her that I wanted to learn more about Islam. She guided me to Darul Arqam’s website and the rest, as they say, is history. The more I learnt about Islam, the more my love grew for the faith. I was finally living that dream I first had when I was 17. Along the way, I started telling family members that I wanted to convert to Islam. Of course, there was heavy rejection, apart from my siblings, who told me that they would respect any decision I made. My father, in particular, being much learned and passionate about his faith, threw plenty of questions at me regarding certain parts of Islam and about the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ. This was a boon because in the course of answering his rather deep questions, I gained a lot more knowledge and became more confident of myself.

I gave myself one final test in early 2023 during the Christian season of Lent. I tried to go to church during the Holy Week period and also did the Christian penitential fast of Lent. However, when I stepped in to the church and tried to pray, I sensed a severe disconnect with the faith. I could not even utter the prayers that referred to Jesus (pbuh) as God. Ramadan 2023 coincided with the latter stages of Lent and I went through my first fasting month. Though I did not know how to pray, I observed Sahur and Iftar. However, fasting without prayer ultimately does not amount to much and so, I could not connect as much as I wanted to. After Eid, I attended the “Let’s Pray 1” and “Let’s Pray 2” modules at Darul Arqam. I had booked a date to take my Shahadah. Though the conversion date will take some time, since I had learnt how to pray, I started doing that using transliterated versions of Surahs and slowly learning the shorter Surahs by heart. I started feeling a deeper connection to Allah ﷻ like I had never felt before. Naturally, I progressed to learning how to read the Qu’ran from Darul Arqam. All of this was before taking my Shahadah and I found myself counting down to the days before I finally did it.

During this time period, my father had also accepted my decision to convert and decided to be with me in person on the day of my conversion. During the countdown to Eid Al-Adha, I came across a sponsored post from Converts’ Central on an Eid Takbir event that was to be held at Joo Chiat. Seeing that it was not that far from Darul Arqam, I decided to register myself for the event. Little did I know at that point that this decision was to change my life forever. I was fasting on the day of Arafah and was looking forward to attending the event with my fiancée in the evening. However, as willed by Allah ﷻ , she had Takbir at home and was unable to come and despite initially deciding not to go, I took the plunge and went for it. While feeling very awkward and apprehensive initially, the warmth exuded by Ustaz Sameer and by Kaven Siddique, the founder of Converts’ Central (and who also happened to have worked with me in the Air Force before) made me loosen up a little bit. It was just after Isyak when Kaven approached me, asking if I would be interested in declaring my Shahadah and affirm my identity as a Muslim. I did not need a second invitation. To begin Eid as a Muslim? Of course! As I was reciting my Shahadah, I felt a sense of calm, peace and happiness that I had never felt before. After the event ended, I met my fiancée who lived down the road and told her the good news, and she broke down with tears of joy.

Since that day, my life has experienced many challenges, many ups and downs but through it all, I never lost faith. As each challenge presented itself and started getting harder, I only went back to God harder in prayer. Whenever anything good happened, I also went back to God with more prayer and thanks. Allah ﷻ has blessed me with this opportunity to be a Muslim. Through prayer and acts, he has worked through me to even gain acceptance from all of my family members. Even when I have sinned, my Lord has never ceased to forgive me when I have gone back to him in prayer. I cannot imagine a life where I am not a Muslim. Imagine waiting your whole life for something and it finally happens. That is what Islam means to me.