A New Lens To View Islam And Life

By Siti Nuraisyah

When I first attended the Tuesday learning circle, Ustaz made a poignant remark that stayed with me: that one is in his thirties is already too late of an age to start learning Islam, so we ought to catch up with our religious learning and practice.

The remark hit me because I had been avoiding going for Islamic classes for some time due to personal difficulties in practising the religion.

I realise however, that the avoidance was not going to bring me to a state any better than I was in.

I knew that eventually, we will all return to our Creator, and I was not sure if I will return to Him in a state He is pleased with.

The reason God created us is to worship Him, as mentioned in the Quran (Surah Adh-Dhariyat, verse 56). Looking at this verse, it made me wonder, is there a proper way to worship Him?

I did not think I had been living my life in a way that is fully aligned with what my Creator wills for. But I also often wondered how I should live my life besides just fulfilling the practical obligations of the religion.

These thoughts pushed me to keep attending Ustaz Sameer’s learning circles, including the Saturday Iqra circle.

Although I had attended classes before on Tajweed and Quranic recitation and initially thought the Iqra classes were for beginners, something in my heart kept nudging me to go because it had been two years since I last attended a class on Tajweed and Quran recitation.

Alhamdulillah, the Iqra class has been an eye opener for me, as it covers more than just Tajweed and Quranic recitation that I am used to in my earlier experiences learning the Quran.

Each week, Ustaz goes through a few different topics throughout the two and a half hours that we are gathered: etiquettes of the Quran, tafsir of a Quranic verse, sciences of the Quran, review of our recitations in the Iqra books, and in between these topics, Ustaz throws in religious reminders and admonishments (which I feel keeps us sober) relating to the Quranic discussions of that week and our Islamic faith in general.

Learning about the tafsir of the Quranic verses has given me more appreciation of how the Quran truly is a guide to our lives. The rulings in the Quran help set our lives in order, because much like how manuals instruct us to use a device in the most optimal way, there is no better manual to base our life on than the one from our own Creator.

After Iqra class, there is usually a zikr session, which was something rather unfamiliar to me, but I kept my heart and mind open to try it out, as I understood there is goodness in it.

It took me some time to get used to and understand the recitations, and I gradually found a sense of peace and calm in my heart every time we finished the session.

Ultimately, I learned that these zikr sessions serve to tighten our connection to Allah and keep us anchored in our faith through life and its challenges, as there is constantly a battle between our ego and our higher selves in striving towards goodness and in overcoming the bad traits we have.

It’s been four weeks now since I started attending Ustaz’s Saturday Iqra circle alongside his Tuesday and Friday circles.

Sometimes, I wonder why I keep coming – because just about a month ago, I would have disregarded attending religious classes for the difficulties I associated with the religion.

I recall a gnawing emptiness festering in me from the avoidance of religious classes and making prayers to Allah to open my heart to the right path back to Him, though I could not imagine how that path will be.

Through the learning circles, I found myself gaining a perspective of Islam that was different from my prior learning experiences of it and have felt a sense of reconnection to my religion.

My personal difficulties in practising the religion had not really gone away, but the new lens that I view Islam through – in knowing more about Allah – has made the difficulties feel lighter to bear.

I have come to realise that it is all in Allah’s grace that He has guided me back to Him and given me the chance to view and practise the religion in a better way.

Indeed, Allah has granted us the gifts of life, knowledge, will, power, hearing, sight and speech, all of which I have taken for granted without paying Him my dues.

While I still do not quite have it all figured out yet, I pray that Allah continues to grant me patience and strength in my learning and practice, and eventually return to Him in a goodly state.